Another World.

There were two best friends. Best-Friends, you know? With a capital B, and a Capital F. They lived in the Land of Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say. Now, for a normal earthling, it will surely be very difficult to conceptualize such a place- to understand how things worked there. Because, you and I- we’ve never seen such a world. Never.

In our world, we say one thing, and mean quite another. Most of the Time! Sometimes.. sometimes, when it’s realllly important to lay bare the facts- we do it- like in the court of law- sometimes. But when it’s not, we use words the meaning of which we donot feel or commit ourselves to. You know, I’m not saying that as a bad thing, really. The disconnect between spoken word and intended meaning, might be instrumental for societies’ survival sometimes. At other times of course, it’s a nuisance, and highly detrimental.

Let me explain how their world was different from the one inhabited by us.

Every morning you go to work, you meet a colleague in the office – the first face (apart from the guard’s) that belongs there. And this person is someone who doesn’t make life any easier for you at work.

They shake their head in acknowledgement of your entry, “Good Morning!” *clinically bright smile*

You respond with an equally prompt, and (brighter and clinical-er), “Good Morning!“

Now, neither of you has any particular wish to make the morning happier for the other. Bah! You may not even care. If they did care about your mornings or evenings or any hour of the day for that matter, they would make sure the next time you approach them for some work from their end, they act like they are worth the money the company’s turning into their bank accounts every month.

Instead, they will gladly become pillars of lead- obstructing your official work- if it makes their own mornings and evenings more pleasant in a sadistic sort of way.

You get a call from your boss, “How about the XYZ report you were supposed to send across to me this morning?”

You want to say, “It’s a friggin’ unrealistic deadline you set for me last evening, Sir. Get real, and wait till noon- Rest In Peace!*Pun Intended*”

But the sound you end up making, is tuned like this, “Sure, sir. Er.. I’ll be sending it across right away.”

Your cell beeps. Again. It’s an SMS from a particularly aggrieved client. The third SMS since last evening. You haven’t been taking his calls since yesterday. Because you know he is asking for information that you are not quite in a place to furnish, yet. Hence, you wait – for things to crystallize at your end. Yesterday you had dropped an SMS- late in the evening, promising to respond by today, apologizing for not being having been able to take calls coz you were in an important meeting until then. The client has responded with something like,

“ That’s fine. Pl do revert at the earliest, with the updates on XYZ”

Interestingly, the client knows you are buying time. That what you’re telling them is hogwash. Still, they play along – dishing more hogwash in return. And giving the situation a semblance of logic, a truth that does not exist. That is the unwritten rule. Words are exchanged without any conviction in or care for, their literal meaning- yet, the intended outcome from the whole exercise- is expected and achieved- often.

Simply put, in your world, you don’t often say what you mean, and mean what you say. And your life comes along just fine.

The world for these two was different. When they didn’t like what someone said, they’d not think inwardly, “what a creep/ moron”, and shake their heads outwardly in a politically correct , “ hmm.. okay…” They’d tell them then and there, “no, that doesn’t sound good. I donot agree. What you are saying doesn’t make any sense to me.” And the other person, would respond with,” Why not? Or I don’t care- this is my opinion. – coz of abc factors“ And blah blah blah… And the world would not come to an end. Work would flow, lives would go on- Just Fine.

Anyway, so we have a fair idea of how the world was different from ours.

Back to the two best friends?

They had practically grown up together. Sharing each other’s thoughts, values, and good and bad times. 18 years had passed like that. 18 blissful years. In their nineteenth year, they were confronted with an issue.

Oh, do you want their names by the way? There’s a reason I haven’t given them any. Coz methinks that’ll tend to prejudice your mind. You’ll try to fit them into one of the first categories that a human being enters into, the moment they step into the material world of life: The Male and The Female.

Here I must tell you another thing about this place. They had no concept of a socially defined Gender or it’s biological equivalent, Sex. That’s right. There were no males or females there. Just people. Don’t quiz me about their procreation system now. That’s not our theme here.

They did have families though. A person’s 19^th year onwards, they could, if they so wished, choose to pick people they wished to spend the rest of their lives with. Yeah, you got that right: people. Not necessarily One Person.

Anyway, if u have to have their names, they were called F1 and F2.

In their 19^th year, one day, F1 and F2 sat by the bank of the river that flowed across their little land. This river separated their world- their little land, from ours. Nobody had ever dared cross the river. Legend had it, that whoever had tried such an adventure in the past, had never returned. It was impossible to survive in this land if you had even once been touched by the world on the other side of the river, the elders of the land told the youngsters.

F1 and F2 sat in deep thought about their lives, now that they had finished their formal education.

After some 20 minutes of silence, F1 spoke, ‘I was thinking I should like to stay with you, F2. Set up a little family. I can think of no one else but you, for someone I’d like to spend the rest of my life with.’

F2, furrowed its brow and replied, ‘Yeah, we do have a good time together. I guess it’s no surprise we should think on these lines- we’ve practically known each other for 18 years.’

F1 was in doubt: “But you know what they say about familiarity breeding contempt?.If we end up spending all our time under the same roof- our 24*7 co-existence might throw up some problems. What if we end up not enjoying each other’s company as family? We have to be doubly sure we that we won’t end up wrecking our friendship with our venture into familial bonding. Well, it is a kind of ‘bonding’ – there’s no two ways about that!”

‘Of course not!’ F2 replied, in surprise. ‘Why should you think so? Well, we do have slightly different lifestyles, and slightly different approaches to life- but well, that should come within the limits of adjustment- shouldn’t it? A successful family is not one with all clones. We’ll be good together, I am sure. We’ll complement each other. You will just have to work towards developing a more responsible attitude towards domestic affairs, of course. You are a bit too carefree and free-spirited at present…and-’

“and you’ll need to develop a sense of humility and sensitivity yourself. Your constant air of superiority – over skills that you possess- and that you think to be of superlative nature- it can be inhibitive for my personal growth, if you don’t give me my due space and respect.‘

F2 frowned. “I guess I’ll have to make that allowance, if you so wish.’

“Then I guess I’ll try to develop the responsible attitude, as you desire me to”, F1 responded, promptly.

They settled on a date of entering into a “Familial Knot”.

Both got up, to start walking away from the river, and towards the colony. Just then, as F1 was getting up, its foot slipped on a particularly slippery small sized rock, and it got flung into the river!

“Help! Help me .. F2! “, It screamed.

F2 froze in terror. It did not know how to swim- none of them in this land did. The river was out of bounds, remember. No one had ever been required to learn to swim in its waters.

“I can’t pull you out. I don’t know what to do!!” Tears stung its eyes. There was no point in even trying to jump in and help. It tried to look around for something to pull F1 out with.

It broke off a long wooden branch from a tree nearby, and held it out towards F1. “Here, hold on to it! … but don’t tug too tightly- I might get pulled in. I can’t risk that!”

And as it held out the branch, it thought to itself – much as it would be pained upon losing its best friend, it would never risk its own life to save the other one’s. This, it was sure of. And it held out the stick- ready to let go, the moment it seemed that it was too risky to hold on.

It just so happened that F1, helped by the stick, managed to attach itself to a small rock, and moving from one rock to another, navigated its way back to the land.

Once safe and out of danger, both heaved a sigh of relief.

“Thank god” F2 muttered. “Could have lost you today!”

“ Yeah. Though I’m surprised you wouldn’t have risked everything you could- to bring me back.”, F1 wondered aloud.

“ Well, would you have? Risked your own life, to save mine?”

“Sure, of course! I wouldn’t have had anything else to live for- if my best friend were gone.”

“That’s strange. I should think I would have survived – life is too big to be lost like that.”

F1 was shocked. It was about to reply that, in that case, it made little sense for them to get into a lifelong commitment of a family. Obviously, F2 did not have the same place for F1 in its life, as the latter did, for F2.

Yet, for some strange reason, F1 did not voice its thought. It coughed- choked on this thought and the inability to put it into words. F2 looked at it curiously. “Are you okay- are you hurt?”, it asked F1, concerned that it might have been hurt in the little accident.

It was hurt, indeed. Deeply hurt. But not physically hurt in the accident – it was emotionally hurt, due to what had transpired- how F2’s intensity of affection towards F1 had revealed itself to be in a disappointingly low measure. It was hurt, angry and disappointed. And all of that, he thought sadly, did not add up to an “Okay.”

Heaving a deep sigh, looking up at the concerned face of its Best Friend of 18 years, it said, “I’m okay”.

How was it, that in the Land of Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say, F1 had uttered words that it did not mean? Well, turns out – the water of the river was more than a borderline between their world and ours. The water – having been contaminated with the germs of the other side, had the potential of infecting any human being with our disease, “Say What You Must, Mean Whatever You May”

F1 was infected. And that was going to change its life forever.

And I don’t mean this as a good or bad thing, either. You notice how prosaic their lives really seemed to be, in this land? Could such a matter-of-fact place breed any sense of poetry, literature, romantic arts, or any of the other beautiful things that are founded in the ambiguous, the imaginative, the uncertain, the mysterious and the unspoken? Perhaps not.

Let us consider an example: What kind of poetic beauty could be created on the beautiful concept of hope in such a place?

Hope is the state when one won’t let go

Of the belief, that things can be so.

Everyone hopes, hopes for the best,

Some come true, but not the rest.

That is a poem, right? And it states all facts. It rhymes too. Yet, does it move the reader to ponder, to wonder and to exclaim in delight on the concept of hope?

Wouldn’t an element of romance, a certain beauty be added if some quality of uncertainty, some things- unspoken, unclear and open-ended, is imparted to the concept?

Say,

That which survives all space and time,

That which endures all gloom and grime,

That which makes men hold on – for more,

It’s hope, and hope that takes one ashore.

Okay, pardon the naïve hand at poetry. Naïve and rather poor, I know. But it was just an attempt to indicate the point of my point! I hope it has gone home. Hence, for all this, maybe, this infection did make the life of F1 richer- in a way. I am not sure- I can only guess. And my guess is only as good or bad as yours.

But that night, F1 came home, sat by its phone- staring at the instrument for hours. It just had to make a call to F2, and tell it – in no uncertain terms, that spending rest of their lives together, was just not meant to be.

Yet, it couldn’t bring itself to do that. Something held it back. It was not sure what it was, though. It tossed the phone aside, and shifted from one side to another, on its cot. Well, the decision was sad, alright. But it was the right thing to do. Their lives wouldn’t be any happier if they didn’t acknowledge the truth, and take the right call. It was not sadness that held him back. It was a complex feeling that it had never had before.

It now knew that F2 did not value it, in the same way as it valued F1. It was sure that even F2 had failed to analyze this disparity – F2, sometimes, could be too self-absorbed and too full of itself to give this matter much thought.

“Huh!” F1 thought wryly, “That one is not even worth the value I place in it. The Liar, the cheat”.

A small voice in its head seemed to ask him, with a wicked grin: Is that so? So why fret over losing a family with someone who is not worth it?

F1 frowned. That honest voice was familiar- it belonged to its former self! The self that was uncontaminated - before the river accident!

But now, there was another voice, that whispered in its head, rather slyly. “What are you going to tell F2? That you know it does not value you the way you do? And let it know how you have always known the gap between you two. That your friendship has always been defined by an inequality of skill, knowledge, personality- that F2 has had the superior place in the relationship, since forever. That you were always the weakling that held onto this friendship coz you admired F2 for all the qualities you found lacking in yourself? Even though those left you feeling small and worthless, compared to it? Have you the heart to face humiliation by this acknowledgement? That too, before someone who already looks at everyone else as though they are imperfect versions of people it ought to have been blessed with?”

F1 never made that call. Instead, it picked up a pen, to release its thoughts and relieve its mind of the burden that they caused. Tears, streamed down its eyes, as It wrote:

Someday, sometime I wish you’ll ask,

If it’s okay for you to remove the mask;

And face me- for what you really are,

And if I am to you, an indelible scar:

A mark impressed upon you such,

You can’t rub off, try as you much;

For our fate had it so designed,

To me, were you, to be resigned.

Should I, or not, just walk away,

And let you be, wherever you may?

I ask myself- but then I fear,

Your loss, to me, would be much dear!

So I’ll stay put, unloved – uncared,

Will always wonder, what if I’d dared…

*Drumrollllll*

*bugles*…

Welcomeee to our World of Shades of Grey! Where things are obtuse, facts are presented in a variety of trays, garnished with such varied kinds of stuff that you’d never be able to make out, what you’re really picking up. Where black and white rarely exists. The whole richness of the world is defined in the grey area. That’s what keeps the world growing and glowing. The ambiguity, the uncertainty, the unspoken, the mysterious, the implied- the disconnect between what is and what is stated – runs the show. To ‘house full’ :-)

On another day, F1 would have just called F2 and told it that the Familial Knot plans were called off, sad as it was.

On this day, F1 created literature! All Thanks to the water from the Land of “Say What You Must, Mean Whatever You May”

That’s the difference :-)